Purple Quest
by The Tiny Viking
Summary: After a fight with Red about a love letter, Purple quits and sets out to find the one who wrote it. On the way he gains a nest of allies and a brood of enemies. Crossovers crawling out of places you didn't know existed.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim…**

On the 'Massive'…

The Almighty Tallest were at the bridge of the 'Massive' eating some waffles.

"Hey Red, let's play the "Do You Like Waffles" song!" Purple yelled.

"Alright!" Red replied. "Someone do what purple just said." Then the song rang out throughout the bridge.

"Woo!" Purple yelled.

Then a Irken approached him. "Sir, you have a letter."

Red grabbed it. "That'll be all." The Irken bowed and walked off.

"What does it say Red?" Purple asked, chugging some maple syrup.

"I was getting to that." He read the letter's heading, he got a surprised look and read it again. "It's a love letter for… Tallest Purple?"

"Really? Who's it for?"

"It's for you dumbass."

"Cool! That was nice of them."

Red sighed. "Purple, do you realize what this means?"

Purple scoffed. "Of coarse I do!"

Red didn't buy it. "You don't really do you?"

"No not really." Purple looked downcast.

"It means someone has taken a shine to you, and not me!"

"I fail to see the problem in that."

"How can someone like you get affection!? You're an idiot!"

He nodded proudly. "Yes I am, yes I am."

"No I mean an idiot! You're the reason that we nobody can buy a Nintendo Wii!"

Purple took that in offence. "Do you really think I'm an idiot? I thought that was just friendly banter…"

"Well it wasn't! You're worse than Zim! I don't know why they made you the tallest!"

"Fine, then I guess you can be the _only_ tallest."

Red paused, staring at his 'Brother' "You mean you're leaving?"

"Yep, oh. And before I go I have a couple things to say."

Red was all ears.

"Number one: remember how I always laughed at your jokes cause I thought they were funny?"

Red nodded.

"Well I didn't!"

"You MONSTER!" Red yelled out. "Everyone thinks my jokes are funny!"

"We just throw pity laughs at you so you don't feel bad. Number Two: Remember how we always fought about who Myuki liked better in Highskool?"

Red nodded.

"The night before Zim killed her, we DID IT!! And you know what else, she said I was the best she ever had!"

"What!?"

"And number 3..."

"I can't stand it." Interrupted Red.

"Too bad! Number 3: I beat your high score on Super Mario Brothers by 1 point!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Red screamed. It was a big deal considering Red had the highest score in the universe at 999,999,999,999,999 points.

"I'm leaving now, see ya… Red." Purple spit at him.

A few moments later…

Purple arrived at a small ship he had custom designed. Nobody suspected that he built it because he set his standards so low, just so he could get away with more. 'Now to find the person who wrote this.' Purple thought to himself as he drew out the letter. 'But first I'll need some help. Maybe Zim could help me.' With his destination confirmed he took his ship to Earth.

Earth…

"Get back here Zim! Show us all who you really are!" Dib yelled.

"Make me Dib-Monkey!" Zim shouted back. Then he took out a communicator. "GIR! Pickup, now!"

"Yes sir!" GIR's voice replied. Then Zim's sidekick flew towards him, grabbing his arm and taking him back to his base.

"See ya Dib! It looks like today's game is over!" Zim yelled.

"Damn you Zim!" Dib yelled back.

Zim sighed, it was Highskool and Dib was still after him. He thought Dib would've given up and decided to chase attractive females by now. "I've had a rough day GIR, so straight to the base."

"Very well." GIR replied. GIR was much different than he once was. He was just like a teenager now, as smart as one too. Plus his body was tall, slim, and muscular.

"Tell me GIR, how'd your date with Gaz go?" (Yes, Gaz. She's taken a liking to the new GIR)

"It went flawlessly sir."

"Really?" Zim raised an eyebrow.

"Metaphorically speaking, I meant it was great."

"Ahh." Zim massaged his temples. "I need a soda."

"We'll be home in approximately… 1 minute and counting."

"Good."

They didn't talk the rest of the way home. And when they did finally arrive GIR made his famous tacos.

"Thanks GIR." Zim grabbed a taco.

GIR nodded and shoved one in his mouth. Then he turned on the TV and changed the channel to his favorite sitcom.

Zim had fallen asleep, letting out a light snore. Then the doorbell rang.

GIR walked over and opened the door. He saluted. "My Tallest."

"Not anymore GIR, not anymore." Purple said.

"I don't understand."

"I quit being a leader to a doomed empire."

"Doomed?"

"Take Earth's Roman Empire for instance. It was massive for it's age, but it collapsed upon itself."

"I see."

"Is Zim here?" Purple asked.

GIR nodded. "Master!"

Zim fell off the couch. "What is it GIR?"

"Purple is here to see you." GIR answered. Then Purple entered the house.

Zim kneeled. "My Tallest, what brings you here?"

"We need to talk Zim. Sit down." Purple told Zim everything about his mission, then about the quest he had just begun and the fact he needed help.

Zim seemed depressed. "It was all a lie…"

"I'm sorry Zim."

"So you need my help?"

"Yes."

"I'll be happy to help you."

"Good, GIR?"

GIR nodded. "Where master goes, I go."

Purple looked back at Zim. "You should be proud Zim, I've never seen a SIR unit that loyal."

"So should we go?" Zim asked.

"No, we need more than just three of us." Purple paused. "Know anyone that might be willing to help us?"

"The Dib-Monkey and Gaz-Human might aid us." Zim said.

"Then let us find them." Purple said. With that, the trio went to the Membrane residence. Purple knocked on the door.

"Who are you?" Professor Membrane asked.

"We like Sci-Fi, tell me are Dib and Gaz home?" Purple asked.

"Yes, please come in." Prof. Membrane welcomed the aliens into his home.

"Alright Zim, GIR. Go get these humans you told me about."

GIR saluted. "Yes sir." Then he ran upstairs.

"Zim!!!" Dib yelled.

Zim turned around. "Hello Dib."

"What are you doing here?" Then Dib noticed the incredibly tall Irken behind Zim. "Who's that?"

"I am Purple, former tallest." Purple answered.

"You mean, leader of the Irkens?"

Zim nodded.

"What do you want?"

"Let me explain." Purple said.

Upstairs…

GIR entered Gaz's room. He saw her looking out the window. "Gaz?"

She turned and looked at GIR in surprise. "GIR?"

He nodded.

"I wasn't expecting you till tomorrow."

"Something has come up, I'm leaving the planet and I want you and Dib to come with me."

She pondered the idea of leaving Earth for a moment. "Sure."

He wrapped his arms around Gaz. "Thanks, I really appreciate this."

"Why are we leaving?"

"My Tallest needs mine and Zim's help. And he requested more than just us. So we came to you." GIR answered.

Back Downstairs…

"Why should I believe you!?" Dib questioned.

"I think it's a great idea Dib, you should go with your creepy friends." Professor Membrane said.

"But dad!"

"No buts son, you need to get out of the house."

Dib glared at Zim, then he looked at purple. "So when do we leave Earth?"

"Whenever you and Gaz are ready." Purple answered.

"Gaz is coming!?"

"That's right Dib." Gaz answered him.

"Fine. Let me get packed."

"Take only clothes and items of great value to you." Purple said.

A few minutes later…

"Alright, we're all packed." Dib said.

"Good, it's time to leave." Zim said.

Purple led the group to his ship. "It'll be a little cramped, but don't worry. We'll find a new one once we leave." They boarded and left for the unknown, but purple knew exactly where to go first.


End file.
